How to Win Friends and Influence People
By: Dale Carnegie
6 ways to make people like you. I've shortened it to 3.
Auuster's Takeaway
1. Handling People
“Any Fool can criticize, condemn, and complain – and most fools do” Mr. Carnegie has three rules when dealing with people. The first is to always consider their perspective before blaming others, there may be reasons why they acted the way they did. By stepping into their shoes, you have to consider what their goals and desires. Understanding this will help you accomplish your goals easier. And if people do a good job, tell them sincerely. People are always fishing for compliments, honest ones mean so much more.
2. Attract People
“Every man I meet is my superior in some way. In that I learn from him.” People want to be greeted with a smile and talk about themselves. Listen to them, divert the conversation in the direction of their interests and show appreciation towards their achievements. Little courtesies will give others a sense of superiority which will give them a feeling of an importance. Make sure you remember their name, the primary way of differentiating ourselves from other people. Ultimately, make others feel unique and genuinely express interest in them.
3. Convincing People
“I conceive, I apprehend, I imagine” The best way to convince someone is to not dig in and get into an argument, a disagreement does not equal an argument. People have their own perspectives based on their experiences you may not think they’re right, but they sure as hell believe they are. If you find yourself in one, get out by listening and understanding their point of view. NEVER challenge their opinion directly, it will only aggravate them. Begin with a friendly tone, ask questions that both parties would agree upon and then slowly learn towards your point of view. It is best to guide the other person to your conclusion, that way they feel like they came up with the idea. Step into their shoes, try to understand their point of view and their thinking. Finally, if you are wrong make sure you admit it, this will make the other person like you way more.